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Ladies, hypothetically speaking, if you were on a date with a guy and another guy started maliciously verbalizing you, and in response to that, your date simply implies an interest in you both merely walking away, then deep down, would you feel – disappointed?

I’m indifferent about this because I’m pro self-defense, and a verbal attack is merely ‘verbal’, but it’s still an attack nonetheless. But without physically making contact, the severity of a verbal attack can blur the lines of warranted and physical self-defense.

There are all kinds of choice-making opportunity in this though. Quite often, verbal attackers are synonymous with bullying, and bullies are typically synonymous with cowardliness. And in making the choice to merely walk away, it opens the window for the cowardly physical assault from behind. It’s certainly no guarantee, but it’s also something that does happen.

Me personally, turning my back on a potential threat seems foolish. Therefore it seems favorable to have an ability to discern just how ‘threatening’ a verbal aggressor is. And if by chance this happens while I’m on a date and a woman is right there with me, turning my back on a serious verbal aggressor could increase the chances of HER getting hurt; unacceptable!

I’ve twisted this, in a sense, from something I occasionally see at work. Not many, but some patrons become quite verbally hostile which is NEVER ok. And some of my teammates are women whom some of these aggressors seem to enjoy running their intimidation tactics on.

Granted, it’s at work and one ‘choice’ I have to keep in mind is the continuity of my employment as well as the general safety of ALL my teammates which is important to me. But taking all aspects of ‘work’ out of the equation and twisting it into a hypothetical date with a woman, a man verbally assaulting me or my date is, well, unacceptable!

Generally speaking, I trust my judgment of a verbal abuser’s likelihood of upping their abuse from verbal to physical. If I genuinely think there’s very little or no chance of their escalating their assault into a physical attack, then I fairly comfortable walking away (generally speaking). But if I genuinely feel there’s a good chance of their becoming physical, then like I said before, I’m pro self-defense, and I would very likely act accordingly.

But my initial question still stands; ladies, if your man merely wishes to walk away from a verbal attack, isn’t that maybe a little disappointing?

Gotta love choices!

Thoughts?

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I'm trying to figure out the location of a date where some stranger would start being verbally abusive with me...must be alcohol involved.  Hopefully the management would have the idiot removed. If my date started acting like an idiot in response, then the evening would pretty much be shot to hell, and that would disappoint me.  If we were in some loud and rowdy bar where that kind of stuff doesn't get a response from the management, then I'm sure I would just prefer to walk away and leave....no loss.
A smart guy would know how to diffuse the situation with a non-threatening response....I've seen my brother-in-law do that numerous times...people end up shaking hands and apologizing.   That's so much better than some guy who thinks he needs to "fight for my honor" because of some random insults.  I've also been caught in the middle of a booze-fueled fight at a sporting event, with scars to show for it....if one of those guys had just walked away, mayber fewer people would've been hurt.

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Originally Posted by Tiramisu Sue:
That's so much better than some guy who thinks he needs to "fight for my honor" because of some random insults.  

... this is pretty much what I was thinking.

And as you say not knowing the location / event / whatever ... hard to say ... but generally I can pretty much take care of myself so no I would not be disappointed.    Very much dislike the thumping chest sort of guy.

On the other hand, I tend to date pretty hulky guys so a man who would be stupid enough to verbally abuse me with my guy around pretty much gets exactly what he deserves.  (Although I would prefer a peaceful "ending").

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all depends on where we are and why there is a verbal  attack but  no i wouldnt be dissapointed if my date walked away that would show  he dont have to use fists to prove hes a man.

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As a man, the only time I was involved with something like this, I just gave the bartender a nod, looked at the guy told him if he wants to make something of it let's step outside, while rolling up my sleeves. We walked to the door, being twice his size, I shoved him out, then locking it while the bartender called the police. The other guy at our table went to the back door, locking it so the verbal offender was couldn't get back in. The police showed up arrested the drunk while he was still pounding on the door to get back in. We had a great remainder of our night with free drinks from everyone else because of the way we handled it.

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I have never in my life been in a situation where this was an issue and I honestly do not know where you come up with the questions you come up with. And why . . . what are you doing with all of the information you gather here?