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This is BIG!


Chicago Lawyer Objects to Buxom Woman at Trial Table

A Chicago lawyer says his opponent in a small-claims case is using an unfair tactic by having a buxom woman sit next to him at counsel’s table.

Attorney Thomas Gooch said the woman’s sole purpose “is to draw the attention of the jury away from the relevant proceedings” — a dispute over a used car. He’s asking Cook County Circuit Judge Anita Rivkin-Carothers to order the woman to sit in the gallery with other spectators.



Responding to Gooch’s pretrial motion, attorney Dmitry N. Feofanov said the woman is his paralegal assistant and that Gooch cites no “good-faith legal argument” why she can’t sit at the table reserved for each side’s legal counsel. Feofanov asked Rivkin-Carothers to impose sanctions on Gooch for his motion.

Gooch said he wasn’t objecting to the woman because she’s buxom but because he doesn’t think she is a paralegal.

“Personally, I like large breasts,” Gooch said. “However, I object to somebody I don’t think is a qualified paralegal sitting at the counsel table — when there’s already two lawyers there — dressed in such a fashion as to call attention to herself.”

Gooch said he and Feofanov previously faced off in mandatory arbitration and that he objected to the woman sitting at the counsel table and arbitrators asked her to leave.

According to Feofanov, the paralegal — identified in court documents as Daniella Atencia — has been paid as a paralegal in two court orders by Cook County judges. Both times, the rate for the paralegal was $115 an hour.

“That’s not a qualification,” Gooch said. “That means Dmitry handed up a bill to a judge that said ‘paralegal’ on it.”

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Scott, please keep us ABREAST of the latest developments in this case...

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Titillating, isn't it?

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Looks like Gooch is going for the   jugular

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But Feofanov needs her there because there will be   mounds of work for her.

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I think both of the attorneys are   boobs.

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Seriously, I'm really not looking at Holly's Double Bumpers  

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With certitude!

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Having an attractive assistant sit at counsel table is one of the oldest tricks in the book ... wear discrete business suit (short skirt and a long jacket) with nylons and high heeled pumps.  Add just enough feminine touch (like a silky bright colored blouse buttoned just to there) to make their minds wander ... be certain to occasionally bring writing utensil up to mouth in a dreamy yet suggestive way.  Cross and un-cross legs often.  Her duties (besides being previously described distraction) will include maintaining the exhibits so she constantly has to shift around in seat and better yet, get up and bring files to counsel at podium or stand to organize and re-organize.  

Yep, been there ... done that !  I will however admit to never hearing an argument about it before the Court ... let alone an actual pre-trial motion to get her out of courtroom.  They must need some serious time to actually use THAT stall tactic ... lol.

So where are these large knockers ?   Is that her in the pic above ? ... seriously ?  HMmmmmm ... not seeing it.    

... I should be their expert witness in this case.

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Originally Posted by Teri Lacy:
Having an attractive assistant sit at counsel table is one of the oldest tricks in the book ... wear discrete business suit (short skirt and a long jacket) with nylons and high heeled pumps.  Add just enough feminine touch (like a silky bright colored blouse buttoned just to there) to make their minds wander ... be certain to occasionally bring writing utensil up to mouth in a dreamy yet suggestive way.  Cross and un-cross legs often.  Her duties (besides being previously described distraction) will include maintaining the exhibits so she constantly has to shift around in seat and better yet, get up and bring files to counsel at podium or stand to organize and re-organize.  

Yep, been there ... done that !  I will however admit to never hearing an argument about it before the Court ... let alone an actual pre-trial motion to get her out of courtroom.  They must need some serious time to actually use THAT stall tactic ... lol.

So where are these large knockers ?   Is that her in the pic above ? ... seriously ?  HMmmmmm ... not seeing it.    

... I should be their expert witness in this case.

It'd work for me.

But hey ... I'm shallow!

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Originally Posted by Scott Terry:

An update ...

No wonder Feofanov is smiling in the pic.  As the old joke goes ... "Your honor, that's no lady ... that's MY WIFE!"

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AHHaHA ... priceless !
She is very pretty  

PS ... not shallow, Scott ... more like a normal red-blooded American male ... just as it should be.