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Nine months ago, we lost Nikki to Toxic Shock Syndrome.  To date, 3,321 people have viewed her story through Facebook forum.  We can't stop there and have to continue to share this so that no one has to go through the pain of losing a loved one to Toxic Shock Syndrome.
We miss Nikki every day but our hearts continue to heal.  I still struggle daily with the what ifs and the guilt that I could have done something more but we now look forward to the what will be.  The day will come when we will get to see Nikki face to face again and what a glorious day that will be!!!  Until then, we talk about all the wonderful times we shared with her and I cherish each and every moment that God blessed me with that amazing young lady.
Most of the memories I have of Nikki are full of laughter and that amazing smile.  Just watching how her smile brought out joy in all those around her made me proud.  To this day, I can close my eyes, hear her laughing and see that beautiful face smiling from ear to ear.  Sadly though, some of my favorite memories were at the expense of others because she inherited my sarcasm.  The way Nikki and I tag teamed our sarcastic remarks was like poetry in motion!  I miss that.  
A few months ago I would have told you that I hated the silence.  Anytime I was alone, the pain was overwhelming.  Now, I look forward to those quiet moments when I'm struggling because I can hear Nikki speaking to my heart.  There is nothing more comforting than to hear "I'm ok, Mom." or "Don't cry, It's going to be alright.".  Nikki was part of my heart and soul and that bond cannot be separated.  People may think I'm crazy but in that stillness we are connected.  These are now some of my favorite special moments. Through God and Nikki's presence, I will overcome this grief and live a joyful life once again.  I see glimmers of happiness in moments spent with my family, especially my grandson, Braylon.
Toxic Shock Syndrome is thought to be a very rare infection but I believe it is far more common than reported because so few cases are actually reported as Toxic Shock Syndrome. The majority are reported as septic shock.  In Nikki's case, the doctor who removed the tampon fibers stated Toxic Shock Syndrome as the cause of death while the death certificate reads "septic shock".  Nikki's death was not reported to the State of Texas as Toxic Shock Syndrome.  Makes me wonder how many others are not reported as Toxic Shock Syndrome.
The warning signs of TSS are very similar to a bad case of the flu.  In Nikki's case, she experienced aching, vomiting, back pain, fever, and a rash on her face.  From Thursday to Tuesday, it went from flu like symptoms to death.  
In honor of Nikki's 9 month anniversary in Heaven, I am asking you to please pass this on once again to everyone you know and ask them to forward it to all of their contacts.  Together, we may be able to save someone's life.  Thank you and may God bless your family with health and many happy memories together.